Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Billy's Favorite (Comic Book!) Retro Games! (Part 8 of 200)
It's Watchmen week and this video game dork must don the comic book geek hat to bring you some fave retro games...with a TWIST! Comic book related games! Today? Perennial favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Arcade Game!That's right. Not the arcade original, the NES port of the arcade game. When I was a kid I and all my TMNT/video game obsessed chums thought that this game really WAS a sequel to the awful first NES game. Of course it's not. The arcade game was made by a different team within Ultra Games/Konami and came out in the arcades a little bit later than TMNT.
As kids we spent many quarters on the arcade cabinet whenever we saw it. It fun and had beautiful graphics. For kids weened on the Nintendo Entertainment System, TMNT: The Arcade Game was like a dream. Our favorite cartoon come to video game life.
So, of course when we heard that the game was being ported to the NES we were ecstatic. Many, many things could go wrong porting such a vibrant game to the 8-bit system and to be honest, the graphics did take a big hit.
It went from THIS:
To This:
For an NES game it doesn't look too bad, but comparatively... whoo boy. What a difference.
Now, Donatello looks super lonely in the NES photo and one of the reasons for that is another arcade-to-NES tradeoff. The arcade version had four player co-operative game play. The NES didn't. I know, sucks, right. But don't fret, the game still included two player simultaneous gameplay.
It's not all bad news for the NES version. One of the best reasons to play the home console version is that nearly all of the levels were lengthened for the NES. Yes, Konami was polite enough to make the game longer! Not to mention the addition of an entirely new level: Snowfield
Apparently Shredder took time out of his plan to kidnap Master Splinter and created a weather control device and for one level he freezes New York City and yep, that's a mutant polar bear wearing a leather jacket. That ALONE makes this game worth playing. Man, things were so cool in the late 80s/early 90s.
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Barney Mamma Drama
How I Met Your Mother: The StinsonsSeason 4 Episode 15
After a two week hiatus, "How I Met Your Mother" returned with another Barney-centric episode. We are teased with a future return to a Barney-Robin love tiff. Though I laughed a little, I just keep wondering, WHO IS TED'S WIFE!!!In an interesting twist, the gang follows Barney thinking he has a secret girlfriend. After a long cab ride, the group comes to where Barney is going to then find it is actually Barney's mother. A woman then appears who is then told to be his wife. A kid appears as well and Barney tells them it is his son.
When his mother leaves the room, we are told that it is just an act, that Barney is trying to appease his mother's dying wish (made several years earlier) that he finds a family. There are a few jokes about trying to hide the fact that the situation is all a lie from his mom. Nothing that I truly enjoyed, and very off from the atypical Barney jokes we expect.
The side joke of Robin and Barney's fake son both dealing with crummy jobs was humorous and oh so creepy. I didn't really laugh at Lily and Marshall dealing with his mother not liking her, as my mother is in love with my girlfriend.
I still have no clue how much longer they can keep up the ongoing idea of Bob Saget telling the long and convoluted story of how he met his children's mother. If this season is any indication, be prepared for a Barney spin-off in 2011.
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People That Like Puns Might Call It - Wonderful
Despite my dreams of a Joss Whedon-directed live action film, the movie gods and fools that DC Comics and Warner Bros have in charge of these things conspired against me. So there's no Wonder Woman movie, no Flash movie, no Green Lantern movie or Justice League movie, while Marvel plots ways to pump out one Punisher movie after another. No, DC seems dedicated to carving out a small niche with animated films as we saw in "New Frontier" and "Superman: Doomsday" and now this "Wonder Woman" film.Thanks to a tougher attitude this nice little flick isn't high drama or a great action film, but its violent, funny and has a "Clash of the Titans"-style battle set in Washington, D.C. that puts the comic's recent Amazons Attack! storyline to absolute shame. In the interest of full disclosure, we're reviewing the Blu-Ray copy of the film below the cut.
I'll give the opening battle this: even if the animation style can't compare to the Batman/Superman/Justice League television series, it had to have set the record for opening scene decapitations for an animated film. So right off the back, we know that writer Michael Jelenic and director Lauren Montgomery are getting everything they can out of the PG-13 rating. There's neck snapping, blood, death, bonding over tequila and explosions... oh and lots of shots to the nuts. Which is only appropriate in a story about the greatest warrior in the DC Universe.
In the title role, Keri Russell ("Mission: Impossible 3") does a better job than Lucy Lawless from "The New Frontier" but the facial animation and sharp lines give a rather inhumane feeling to everything. Still she does a fine job with a difficult role. The Diana of this story follows a substantive part of the plot from George Perez's 1985 reboot of the character with a few substantive differences from other versions of the origin tale. Here, Diana is a fully grown woman, who's been trained in combat for millenia, but she's always been the child of her people and knows nothing of the outside world.
"Justice League Unlimited" veteran Nathan Fillion steps into the male lead role of Steve Trevor with gusto, rollicking as a fun-loving fighter jock that's right in his wheelhouse. Since Diana can carry more of the dramatic weight and fighting, Trevor gets to pull out one-liners one after the other.
The rest of the cast is pretty impressive throughout. Alfred Molina is in full Doc Ock villain mode as the God of War, Ares. He chews his share of scenery like any good comic book villain. Rosario Dawson and Virginia Madsen are both good, but unexceptional as Artemis and Hippolyta, respectively. Oliver Platt is the least interesting performance as Hades. Of course there's a couple of wonderful segments featuring John Di Maggio ("Futurama").
The plot is pretty thin, but there's jokes, monster brawling and invisible jets to more than fill the 74 minute running time. The continual improvement in the DC animated films takes yet another substantive step forward in this movie.
As far as special features, the first thing I checked out was the preview for the upcoming Green Lantern animated film. Unfortunately, it's pretty much a simplistic review of the Green Lantern history and then someone compares it to "Training Day"... um, yeah, that isn't a great sign. But, hey Daddy Bristow himself (Victor Garber) plays Sinestro and that is a good sign. Besides that, the disc includes four Wonder Woman-centric episodes of Justice League and Justice League Unlimited selected by Bruce Timm. Of course, I would wager most of the DC fans that pick this up probably have the JL box sets by now.
"Wonder Woman: A Subversive Dream" is a slightly romanticized take on the origins of the Wonder Woman character as created by William Moulton Marston. And the phrase "mirror of our society" applied to comic books always rubs me the wrong way. In all honesty, most mediums of entertainment are easily described that way, so its nothing special. But the idea that the age of the typical comic consumer back then was younger, when people are more open to the imprinting of new ideas seems very appropriate. Whereas the first documentary is more interested in society's views and the impact of the character, "Wonder Woman: Daughter of Myth" deals more with the mythological history of Amazons and the character history, significantly intercut with clips from the main movie.
The commentary track is recorded by numerous members of the creative team including Jelenic, Montgomery and Timm. The track was actually recorded before the voices were completed and that's a huge mistake given that so much of whether or not the film works is the voice acting. Because of this the tone is much more directed at the technical aspects and that gets old well before the film wraps up.
None of the special features on my version of the film were worthy of repeated viewing and aren't very informative for people already familiar with the history of the character and her evolution in comics. But the film itself is a nice, quick action piece that still pulls off an epic vibe.
Final score: B
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Killin' Time With 24
24: 6:00P.M.- 7:00P.M./ 7:00P.M.- 8:00P.M.Season 7, Episodes 11 & 12
Welcome to "Killin' Time With 24." A weekly morning-after 24 discussion hosted by your faithful That's A Wrap editors, Billy and Jim.Every Tuesday morning we get together to discuss the previous evening's episode of 24. What we liked, disliked and where we would like to see the series go while avoiding any real work. It's like a virtual coffee break.
Sit back and let us do the complaining for you.
(10:10:59) Jim: so, 24...
(10:11:09) Jim: 2 Action Packed Hours
(10:11:16) Billy: of nonsense
(10:11:43) Jim: Breaking into the White House should not be that easy.
(10:12:00) Billy: Apparently the White House is easier to break into than the Russian embassy in season six...
(10:12:11) Billy: Than Chinese embassy in season 5
(10:12:24) Billy: And any number of other embassies
(10:13:05) Jim: at least we can lay to rest whatever hope we had that this season would improve as we approached the second half
(10:13:45) Billy: well, I figure Juma AKA Tony Todd AKA Worf's brother, will be dead by next hour
(10:14:09) Billy: and then Jon Voight will become the bad guy
(10:14:24) Billy: So, yeah, this season ain't gettin' better
(10:15:00) Jim: why isn't Bill Buchanan dead?
(10:15:15) Billy: The whole night I was thinking that it was the big two parter, none of our cast has died and Bill and Aaron are in the white house with terrorists
(10:15:24) Billy: one of them is a goner
(10:15:48) Billy: it's kinda sad that the only way this show shocks me now is when they don't kill a main character.
(10:15:49) Jim: but neither of them buy it
(10:16:06) Billy: Bill had better not die
(10:16:18) Billy: I need closure about his wife!
(10:16:29) Jim: yeah, I hope in the resolution of this current hostage crisis somebody more important than the dad from That 70s Show dies
(10:16:56) Jim: does Aaron really have anything left to live for? I think not.
(10:17:04) Billy: He has a son!
(10:17:14) Billy: Palmer always talked about him!
(10:17:46) Jim: Yeah, but his son is fine sitting on the bench for the Dillon Panthers... no worries there.
(10:18:11) Billy: The writers also got their "number of administrations" that people worked for wrong.
(10:18:23) Billy: With both Jack and Aaron.
(10:18:58) Billy: I'm going to sound like a crazy fanboy here, but in season 2 Aaron clearly states that he's been in secret service since Reagan.
(10:19:06) Billy: That's more than five.
(10:19:21) Billy: we've seen at least five on the show!
(10:20:02) Jim: Nice catch
(10:20:30) Billy: So, Jon Voight
(10:20:35) Billy: has a package
(10:20:44) Billy: that Juma's men can render useless
(10:21:01) Jim: and is more important than risking implication in an assault on the White House
(10:21:03) Billy: Nuclear, Nerve, or Bio?
(10:21:25) Billy: Let's play WHICH WEAPON WILL COME NEXT!
(10:21:25) Jim: I'm going Nuclear
(10:21:32) Jim: it feels like it's been a while
(10:21:46) Billy: Yeah, Voight didn't really think his plan through
(10:22:20) Billy: attacking the U.S. after a crazy Candyman--er, General Juma takes the president hostage
(10:22:32) Billy: might not be the best time to accomplish your goal
(10:22:46) Jim: It's rather convenient that Juma and his laptop wielding buddy control the only means of interior or external communication in the White House. Which hopefully for Voight cannot be traced
(10:23:19) Billy: My favorite line of the night: "Get me a secure channel!"
(10:23:51) Billy: Oh Juma, this is 24, not Star Trek....
(10:24:58) Jim: and apparently the writers are so dedicated to hammering the Torture is Right/Wrong debate into every instance of the show, Senator Red Foreman needs to debate it with Bill while they are being held hostage.
(10:25:01) Jim: That was nice.
(10:25:42) Jim: I'd be satisfied if they could limit the ends justify the means debate to just three conversations per show.
(10:25:51) Billy: The whole "You won't face the evil by torturing it, cause you're a big sissy" diatribe by Bauer was SUPER obnoxious
(10:26:29) Billy: Guys, you are on the precipice of losing the liberals
(10:26:35) Jim: I would absolutely love for Jack to torture the wrong person just ONCE like his buddy Robert Carlyle did. The idea that on the show just ONCE the ends didn't justify the means.
(10:26:41) Billy: especially when you sound like Rush Limbaugh
(10:27:59) Billy: Jack giving Bill the stink eye about him not wanting to torture someone was really funny.
(10:28:10) Billy: because...look where you are Jack!
(10:28:27) Billy: Behind prison bars. Torturing that guy worked out SO well.
(10:28:58) Jim: and Jack's trying to coerse him to do it with someone else in the room!
(10:29:19) Jim: What's Bill supposed to say, "That's a very good point actually, pal."
(10:29:41) Jim: so who has the best odds of surviving the crisis? Jack leads the way at about 1,000,000-1 and Jum's men on the opposite end of 1-50,000,000 against. Who will live? Who will die?
(10:30:12) Billy: I don't know
(10:30:17) Jim: they've introduced the VP, so even Taylor is on the table
(10:30:18) Billy: I think Bill is dead.
(10:30:30) Billy: The VP is a no-name
(10:30:39) Billy: so I don't think Taylor is dead
(10:31:03) Billy: Maybe they will continue to shock us by NOT killing anyone
(10:32:05) Billy: Last night felt SO long
(10:32:25) Billy: Two of the most boring ridiculous hours of my life
(10:32:40) Jim: I say Aaron buys it. My hierarchy of survival is: Jack, Taylor, Renee, Taylor's Daughter, Bill, Senator Red Foreman, Moss, Juma, Aaron, the rest of Juma's men
(10:33:16) Billy: I could honestly stop watching this show right now and not care enough to find out what happens next.
(10:33:29) Jim: Maybe I could, but I won't
(10:33:34) Billy: I won't
(10:33:36) Billy: I know
(10:33:46) Billy: I'm too much of a 24 whore
(10:33:57) Billy: but I really wish the fan phone was still working
(10:34:02) Jim: despite all our just criticism, someday this season will be on sale on DVD for $15-20 and we'll buy it
(10:34:55) Billy: I feel slightly upset that I spoke to Jon Cassar[Executive Producer and Director] in season 4.
(10:35:18) Jim: yeah, now is time we feel the need to get in touch with them
(10:35:22) Billy: cause I would have given him an ear full
(10:35:26) Billy: this season
(10:37:40) Jim: at least Jack and Renee might be back on track... I think you might at least get a happy ending there. The fact that the writers felt the need to have Moss remind her that POTUS was the priority and not Jack feels like leading by the hand to that eventual point of joy.
(10:38:07) Billy: Why did they break into the white house....oh my lord. Why couldn't the Prez been at division or FBI headquarters. Anywhere but the white house. Totally killed the whole night for me. So that one sewer is the key?
(10:38:23) Billy: Yes. Renee and Jack.
(10:38:40) Billy: Except that Jack has been such a massive dickhole this season
(10:38:56) Billy: Giving him a happy ending just doesn't seem right.
(10:39:47) Jim: it isn't Jack fault. they've had every random person under the sun debate interrogation methods with him is a big part of that. I have expect him to stop at a hot dog vendor that asks, "So Chinese water torture... your thoughts?"
(10:40:02) Billy: Wait. You’re the hot dog vendor?
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Let Me Show You How to E.T.S.
Heroes: ExposedSeason 3, Episode 18
So when did Sylar gain the power to remember the distant past via the power of the Mac Attack? Do I really need to once again mention the plethora of ways this show manages to annoy me? Perhaps I should just Embrace The Suck (E.T.S.) and be thankful that Hiro and Ando are utter no-shows for a second consecutive week. Even if it gives more time to the painfully ill-constructed Adventures of Claire and Aquaboy, I mean... one crappy regular character is a fair trade for two.And just to prove that I did, once upon a time, like this show, I'll mention that this week's writers Adam Armus and Kay Foster once did the script for the pivotal "Homecoming" episode back in the glory days of season one. It was actually one of my very favorite episodes ever (and that used to be saying something). Below the cut we spoil the heck out of their latest effort.
This week's episode effectively involves just three plots, so things at least aren't as jumbled together as they normally are. Peter and Parkman are led by the hand (REBEL) from Isaac Mendez' loft/Mohinder's laboratory/a set I assume was constructed using a load-bearing wall so they decided to keep forever to the infamous Building 26 in Washington, D.C. Once there it turns out Daphne was moved to a medical facility. Why wasn't she in the medical facility earlier in the day when REBEL contacted them since, ya know, she was shot at least several days ago, we may never know. Instead Peter steals a video of men in black suits and masks leading people in orange jumpsuits and masks onto a plane. Somehow this is concrete proof that the American government is kidnapping American citizens. Apparently I missed the scene in the premiere where the word "American" was written on the back of everyone's clothing.
This sequence at least had the very first moment since this arc began that the bald technician isn't looking at the exact perfect video feed at any given time. I got no small amount of jokes out of this. I mean this guy was right on catching Claire's car near Aquaboy's comic show, Sylar driving on a nondescript road and Peter at Bennet's storage unit and later at apartment of the Hunter (Emile Danko, why he got a nickname we may never know). But they don't see the guys walking into their control room in the middle of the day.
Peter escapes, but Matt is captured because apparently a fire alarm is the secret to diffusing his mental powers. Which is a far better reason than... I don't know... someone surprises him! I have to credit Peter with at least coming up with a plausible plan to trade back for Daphne and Matt by threatening to expose the tape. I fully expected something monumentally incompetent, but at least he didn't bring the tape with him to the meet, though it would have been nice to know exactly how the tape would be released if they blew Peter's head off. And let's just ignore the idea of the government making a video diary of their own criminal activities in the first place.
In the night's other story, Claire's glorious idea of hiding Aquaboy in her closet turns out poorly. I know... who knew? He's quickly discovered by her mom and that leads to some painfully unfunny sex jokes before Saundra decides to help them. The solution involves making a fake i.d. and hiding him in another closet when the federal agents violate their stakeout for no reason whatsoever to toss the place.
I thought it was cute that Saundra and Lyle got involved as decoys in a move straight out of "Coneheads." Though it would have been more enjoyable if they were distracting more than just two people sitting in a van in front of the house. Do you really need decoys to slip out the back if there isn't anybody watching the back? Is the government's plan to watch a house involve monitoring only one-third of the doors?
Let's avoid looking too closely at the not-so-brilliant getaway plan of hiding in a pool. Because if I was a federal agent chasing a kid who could breath underwater and mysteriously lost him in a backyard where half the space is taken up by a swimming pool, I'd probably check in the pool. It would have been a simple fix, have them dive into an aqueduct or river. C'mon people, break open an issue of Aquaman now and then! And the underwater kiss is just... ugh. You know there would still be air bubbles if you open mouth kiss, especially if you are supposedly breathing out oxygen. And of course that's one of my sci-fi pet peeves, a fish or anything else that swims underwater doesn't exhale oxygen. Please do not encourage children to try and breath underwater by making out with a great white shark. That's just irresponsible. The lesson as always is don't break up your exhilarating escape with multiple incidents of sexual tension.
In the final storyline, Sylar continues to be the king of the musical cues this volume, first "Psycho Killer" and now flashbacks at a roadside burger joint courtesy of Fleetwood Mac's "The Chain." But hopefully, this character is going to maintain a steady path unlike some others (coughNathancoughBennetcoughMohindercough). Now, assuming they are actually trying to build Sylar as an anti-hero (or at least not an utterly evil villain), I can admire what they are trying to do here. And honestly, if he's driven this far with Luke a.k.a. Microwave Boy a.k.a. the Most Annoying Person in the World to Take a Road Trip With Ever, without cutting his skull open, Sylar can't be all that bad anymore. I mean it's a good sign when he spares people that I would kill, isn't it? And having been abandoned by a father that killed mommy (and apparently ingrained the idea of the little forehead slice in Sylar Junior's subconscious) is supposed to build sympathy and would leave Sylar relatively justified in killing dear old dad when they meet (hopefully next week).
I mean let's not pretend this story isn't still utterly awful in most methods of execution, but I've found I can get through an episode and even recount it for a review the next morning by shutting down my higher brain functions and a little E.T.S. It's a fun plan and I'm sticking with it.
One last note, starting here, I'll be using letter grades for my score. Both because they are infinitely cooler and hopefully will help with a more consistent approach to my scoring.
Final score: D+
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Monday, March 2, 2009
Programming Note
A brief schedule of events for the upcoming Extended Watchmen Weekend in honor of the Friday premiere of the new Warner Bros. flick. Being the consensus Greatest Comic Ever, we decided it deserved something extra. So feel free to call off from work as needed and enjoy the following:Thursday - Jim's review of the original graphic novel
Friday - Billy, Garrett and Jim unveil their TaWP 9 Comic Book Movies
Saturday night/Sunday morning - Bill's review of the film
Sunday night/Monday morning - Our WATCHMEN PODCAST will be posted, an event not to be missed (only slightly more important than the film itself)
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Stumbling Backwards
Dollhouse: Stage FrightSeason 1, Episode 3
While I love the Pacino line I quoted last week, this latest episode is the part that reminds us that "The Godfather: Part III"... not so much with the good times. And while Joss Whedon and Eliza Dushku and everybody under the sun tries to remind us how things get better at episode six, I have to ask, "What does that do for me now?" Because now I'm stuck with yet another show in my weekly rotation that could/should be vastly better than it is.The concept is a bit out there, but certainly could be pulled off in a manner more plausible than we've seen so far. While last week's installment was out there, it was at least sold in a convincing manner and advanced the storyline into a more tied-together universe. But now we've got leaps in believability almost as large as the premiere's "Hey, that's your kidnapper? That's SO weird. That's my kidnapper, too! OMG!" As always, spoilers below the cut.
Sorry, Ms. Dushku, but you're officially the Buffy of this show. And please don't mistake that as a compliment despite the fact that I am a huge fan of BtVS, considering it one of the top ten television shows ever. I've more than once argued that Sarah Michelle Gellar was the weak link of that series and by far the least talented of the four lead roles. If I had to name my biggest problem with an episode, something about her performance would be my answer more than 40% of the time. And at least here, Dushku shares the blame with the concept of her character. The fact that every character she plays is either rather innocent blank slate or any number of some strong, sassy, street-savy uploads certainly doesn't help. No writer has yet shown me a version of her that doesn't come off as fundamentally the same person. I'm not asking for Christopher Reeve-level Superman and Clark are practically different people acting here, just any substantive differentiation in attitude, accent, or actions. Ill-executing the prime concept of the series... not the best way to win over viewers to your cause.
The main assignment of the episode is just about as preposterous as the writers could have come up with. Instead of downloading Echo as a bodyguard and have her pretend to protect a Beyonce-type singer, they program her as a singer who subconsciously will protect her. This is a chronic case of taking it a step further for the writer to appear smarter than they might be (sorry "Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog" vets, Jed Whedon and Maurissa Tancharoen). It only gets worse that the singer is unconvincingly trying to commit suicide by stalker. If things are going to become more complex as the story unfolds, it should be for a better reason than to just make it harder for Echo.
While it's always great to see Kevin Kilner from "Earth: Final Conflict" pop up, it's hard to forgive the use of the terrible lack of involvement of Langdon as the other handler. After last week's action-heavy role and setting up the idea that he might not be ready to go in the field, I expected the second best character on the show to do something more interesting than sitting in a van for 40 minutes, then stepping out only to sit back and let Echo solve things. This human character, I've said before, should be our eyes and ears into the Dollhouse and it would be nice not having him continuously play second fiddle even when Echo isn't loaded with her butt-kicking personality.
At least the best character in the show, or the one currently showing the most potential, Agent Ballard, gets a nice action sequence this week. His showdown with the Russia mob hit men was by far and away (and imagine how far you think I'm talking about and multiply it by 47) the most interesting part of the episode. Unfortunately, he ends up gut shot, so I worry that might be an excuse to hold him out of next week's story.
My big debate after the show took a step back this week was whether I would continue watching on a weekly basis or just ignore it for two or three weeks until it's supposedly getting better. And by the way, it's a terrible sign for a show when the creators are jumping out after two weeks basically saying, "We know it kinda sucks, but it totally gets better." I mean neither "Buffy" or "Angel" hit the ground running at full steam, but they weren't this bad. Right now, however, I stick with it, since the horrific ratings (only 4.72, 4.22 and 4.13 million viewers) might mean we never get to that mythical sixth episode.
Final score: 1 star out of 5
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